How my life fell apart in three days
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This week has been one of the most troubling and scary weeks of my life. first one of my game accounts was hacked (Second Life for those that know me there). They charged so much money and the charges were reversed. It really upset me someone could do that 🙁 is hurt me.
From there the game company decided to ban me, not just me, but any character ever logged in on my computer. Sadly that included some of my friends characters that I used to help with managing sim/building (My friend Kathys) and my friend Jasalyn who let me log in on her character after I was banned. I felt so much guilt. I spent a lot of time crying. The idea that I was hurting people I cared about really ate me up inside.
I decided with my friends help to try find a new Video Game to play. And I think I found one. Things were starting to calm down… but then… I got a message from a friend saying that someone told them I had accused them of hacking me and that I said terrible things about them. It is one of my most favorite people to talk to in the world. I had never been so sad.
I asked my friend what had happened and who had done it… but my friend did not respond to me, or the person who had informed me of what a terrible person I was for things I did not do. I don’t think I have cried this much in a long time. Not only did I loose my video game account, and the friends list of people I love and enjoy. I had now lost 2 of the people I had begun to really, truly love.
I am not sure who is doing this to me, saying nasty things about people I love that I did not say… or who hacked me, I am not sure what is going on. But its haunting me so much.
Right now as I write this,
- My game accounts are banned.
- I have lost friends and contacts I will never be able to get back.
- One of my favorite people to chat to in the world hates me… and is probably hurting over things that were not true…
- My cards are blocked and bank is unusable.
- Its Christmas day tomorrow and I will be all alone.
I don’t know who is trying to make my life worse and more complicated than it is, but I am exhausted, scared, lost… I feel all alone… and I feel like my life is falling apart.
This has been the worst birthday I have ever had. But yes I did turn 30 years old.
If you read this, and you feel I have hurt you. Please talk to me about it. Lets try fix things. The last thing I would do is accuse anyone, say nasty things about people or try to cause people harm. I try to live a life where I don’t hurt people.
Love Maddy
About The Author
Matty is a 36 year old girl who is an Autistic Poet, Writer and Artist and lives alone in Christchurch New Zealand with a kitty! Matty has given many talks on autism and about being unique in a world that's often not accepting, Matty has also engaged with artist and worked on Art projects Matty usually works on an Art project at the same time as a writing one! This means posts can be a bit delayed!
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7 Responses and Counting...
My heart goes out to you, I can understand how much that must hurt. So unfair on you.
Wish I could give you a hug. You will get through this.
Dear Matty,
I am so sorry that someone got into your account and that all this negative stuff is happening to you. And right now would be the worst time of all for these things to be going on. Please do not feel alone in all this, I am following your blog from halfway around the globe and I will be thinking of you especially this Christmas and I will try and send you some good vibes.
Love and Hugs to you.
Oh no! D: I’m sorry you have to deal with all that. Sometimes people do terrible things randomly. It may not be due to anything you did. You should be able to appeal the bans and get your cards unblocked or replaced, especially since the charges were reversed. Anybody who truly knows you should be able to recognize it wasn’t you saying those things. They may be able to talk to you once their initial shock and outrage wears off and they are able to see that. Hang in there, lil sis. I know things are rough right now but there are ways to fix things but you might just have to let the dust settle first. There are still and always will be people who love you regardless of what happens. Like me! <3
They will not appeal the bans 🙁
I still love you babygirl, and i will always love you. I am sorry you are hurting and my thoughts are always with you
Aw, I’m sorry. I hope that it’s all a bit better by now.