A short life of bad Inventions
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NB: A chronicle from a bad inventor!
A short life of bad InventionsAs I think back upon the years gone by
Of inventions big and inventions small
I ask myself  why nothings worked
When I have put my genius into it all!My first invention was at age two
When I painted the bottom of my boots with glue
To chase a spider up a wall
Only to find that I got stuck
After a few steps or five!!My next great invention was at age Six
When I needed something to help me steal cookies!
So I invented a robot arm so complex
Only to find it preferred folding washing!At age Seven I  had to learn how to make my bed
A chore so horrible it was like eating broccoli!
So I invented  a machine that could do it for me
But after making it each time…
It would go to sleep in it for me!At age eleven I had to go to a new school
It was strange being new…
So I had to invent a friend or two
So I set to work on a pair of robots!
Some that would help me become very popular!!
Only to find they were just to smart…
So smart that I didn’t want to be seen with them at all!At age Thirteen I got in trouble
I was told to clean my room and to hurry!
So I created a contraption that would remove useless junk!
Only to find it threw out everything I owned!
Only my bed and old robot arm survived!Finally after a short life of bad inventions.
I decided to give up on my inventing career…
I had grown tired of them not working as planned,
Perhaps one day I will go back to it…
I do need something to help me on the nights I cook dinner…
Perhaps a machine that could replace an oven!!
Though I was told I should never play with fire…
About The Author
Matty is a 37 year old girl who is an Autistic Poet, Writer and Artist and lives alone in Christchurch New Zealand with a kitty! Matty has given many talks on autism and about being unique in a world that's often not accepting, Matty has also engaged with artist and worked on Art projects Matty usually works on an Art project at the same time as a writing one! This means posts can be a bit delayed!
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4 Responses and Counting...
Hahahahahaaaa…….. brilliant matty!!! 🙂
That is the funniest thing i have read for ages…….. thankyou!!!!!!!
( hahahaha ) 🙂
That was soooo funny Matty. I wish you lived nearer as I would love to go to one of your talks.
The inventions made me laugh and it brightened my day. It reminded me of some of my children’s inventions when they were little. Pleasant memories. Looking forward to your next ones.
Oh my. Wonder what will be invented next! Thank you for the giggle!